Holistic Health and Living

Tag: facts

Factual, Informational

Marriages in 21st Century

marriage

Surrounded by an accelerated downfall of the relationship that was to build and hold our society together, nowadays, we see the deterioration of families brick by brick into dysfunctional, broken and unhappy individuals. The glue which was to tie systems together has now withered away and we are left with an unfortunate fate of our social system.Marriages, much like the preparation of the grande celebrations of weddings, last merely for a matter of months. Those which do linger on for longer, encompass a certain reluctant acceptance of what has happened, in the shattered hopes of making the best of the worst. Why have we come to this desperation where marriage is no longer looked forward to as a beautiful journey of love, understanding and growth, but rather, as a forceful binding of two individuals who will fight, argue, cry and hurt, and that’s considered perfectly normal?

Look around yourself! Marriage has become a change in name, a change in house and a change in status, but no longer a change in life, in happiness or in self. Two individuals living under the same roof binded by a contract of ’till death do us part’ cannot possibly be considered the torchbearers of an entire institution which was to form harmony in the society, unless they become pieces of a puzzle – only complete once with each other.

Unfortunately, this notion of a ‘better half’ has been replaced with ‘I do’t need a man/woman to complete me’ and off we all go in the desperate attempts of playing the roles of both, killing ourselves in the process but never admitting to our natural weakness. A marriage which was supposed to be between a man and a woman, two halves coming together as one, is now seen to be between one individual and another individual, two ones coming together as…nothing, and so we go for the inevitable – divorce or separation. Remember, a divorce is not necessarily a documented event to take place, a divorce can be emotional, mental and spiritual when a legally married couple starts living independently from one another even if in the same house.

I ask you. What is the hidden, underlying, all-encompassing reason behind this gradual shredding of the fabric of our society? What has caused this unfortunate series of events to take place which has given birth to a current state of affairs that are disgustingly reprehensible? What has led to the present downfall of everything love and life stood for? And most importantly, what has happened to our people who no longer see the wrong in this disastrous situation?

Ladies and Gentlemen, the answer is in a simple verse of the Holy Quran where Satan says:

“…and indeed I will order them to change the nature created by Allah.”

Al – Quran (4:119)

What nature has been changed by us and how are we falling victim to the trap created by the enemy of our Creator?

“And surely, We have created many of the jinns and mankind for Hell. They have hearts wherewith they understand not, they have eyes wherewith they see not, and they have ears wherewith they hear not (the truth). They are like cattle, nay even more astray; those! They are the heedless ones.”

Al – Quran (7:179)

Look around and Think!

Laws

Money Matters – The Laws of Money

Money Matters – The Laws of Money

According to the Human Development Report of the United Nations Development Program (UNDP), 60.3% of Pakistanis live on less than $2 a day and some 28.6% live on under $1 a day. If we calculate the former, it amounts to almost 108,540,000 people earning less than PKR 200 per day. Another survey which was conducted in 84 countries tells us that Pakistanis spend more of their income on food than any other country. An average Pakistani spends 47.7 percent of their household budget on food consumed at home. In a country, like Pakistan, which is full of natural and human resources, this situation is considered alarming. If we are spending half of our household budget on our most basic need of survival, this is a cause of concern and doesn’t merely depict poverty but rather, indicates a matter of far greater gravity.
Financial abundance is the most desired state of being for the people around us. We struggle hard and work day and night to have ‘enough’ resources to live a smooth life. All of us want to have a comfortable place to live in, a satisfied and happy family to live with, children who have been provided with the best educational opportunities for their growth and future stability, and financial security to live a worry-free life. Other than that, we also have traveled, partying, shopping, socializing, sports and leisure activities, fine dining, fun, and adventure on our wish-list but are unable to turn these dreams into reality till the final moments of life.

The question which arises is simply – ‘why? Why does this happen to us and how can we cope with this situation? There are many reasons for facing adversaries as a nation but, here, we’ll discuss a few suggestions for individuals who want to rise beyond the miserable situation that surrounds them, and live a happy and content life.

The very first thing that needs to be worked on is our direction of life. How should we look at it? Where have we come from and where are we headed towards? What is the purpose of our life? Is it merely about fulfilling every item on our wish-list or is it about something else? As a matter of fact, this life is a blessing from Allah (SWT). He has appointed us as His vicegerent on earth and has given us certain strengths to carry out His job to the best of our abilities as well as to improve the quality of life of our fellow human beings. But the problem arises when we start using these strengths to fulfill our own desires. We know that it is He who is the ultimate Provider and Sustainer but very few of us actually ponder over the Divine Laws to distribute ‘rizq’ amongst His Creations. Quran is full of verses that mention the guiding principles we should live in order to attract more ‘rizq’ to ourselves. Here are a few references to consult: 65:2-3, 10:107, 07:96, 28:77, 14:07, 39:34, 71:10-12

Secondly, if we want our resources to be multiplied, we have to share them with others. Don’t you remember the story of the poor man who asked Musa (a.s) to request Allah to give him his ‘rizq’ all at once? Musa (a.s) did the same and Allah (SWT) answered: ‘if I gave him all his ‘rizq’ at once, his life in this world will end when the ‘rizq’ ends’. Musa (a.s) delivered the message but the poor man insisted on his request to be fulfilled. Allah (SWT) accepted and granted him what he wished for. After a few days, while going to talk to Allah (SWT), Musa (a.s) passed by that man’s place and found hundreds of people being served with lavish food. He was very surprised because the man should have been dead by now. When he arrived at ‘Tur’ he asked Allah (SWT) about the situation. Allah told him that when this man was given what he asked for, he had thought to himself that I am about to die so what will I do with this amount of wealth? So he invited hundreds of people to his house and fed them. And it is My law which states that by sharing what you have with others, you will get more. Hence, I provided him more ‘rizq’ and that is carrying on, still keeping him alive and well.

Abu Huraira reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Charity does not decrease wealth”.

Muslim

Thirdly, if we want to rid ourselves of the financial crunch, we need to improve day by day. The world is making progress at a very fast pace, so, the technology that is new today will become obsolete by tomorrow. Those who do not advance with the same speed will be unable to maintain their financial status for too long. Hence, it is important that you learn new skills every day: bake a cake or mow the lawn; try a new recipe or write an article; learn how to use a new designing software or experience teaching young kids; paint a vase or photograph the beautiful landscape. There are thousands of jobs we can become skilled at which cater to our interests. So, never underestimate the power of these small skills as these can add monumentally to our income if we polish ourselves, target the right market and believe in the power they hold.

Last but not the least, spend wisely and live within your means (it is half of the sustenance as mentioned in Hadith). Unfortunately, we live in a consumer culture where spending has no end. Every other company on Earth is trying to gather more and more customers for their products. Remember, human identity is not defined by what one does but by what one owns. Our desire to spend is manipulated by different marketing tools and tactics which extend to altering our identity by the likes and dislikes of others, as opposed to our own. As a result, people end up spending far more than what their income allows them to, and this ultimately creates a dilemma in the lives of many, forcing them to adopt unethical means of raising their income. Never let the money-hungry companies/manufacturers manipulate your emotions and instead, think logically before buying any product. Every time you pick up an item to purchase, question yourself: “Do I really ‘need’ it or do I just ‘want’ it?” Learn where to, how to, when to, and how much to spend. And, finally, never rely on the intelligence behind the carefully crafted advertisements and marketing strategies to determine where your money goes – rely on your common sense.

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